The hardest part of the work


Take care of yourself. Most of us struggle with this.

Images of the spa come up. No - I can do that later. Too expensive. I have too much to do.

Actually, resourcing yourself is the most important thing you do. The most important.

It doesn’t matter what else has to be done. If you are not available to the task you are a half-person.

We’re all half-people sometimes.

But if we want to bring ourselves to our lives we have to rest.

Self-care is political.

Self-care is creative.

Self-care is loving.

We have limits - that is what it is to be a human being. But so often we act like we do not.

When we don’t respect and nurture the body container in which we live we undo our possibilities.

When we resource ourselves, rest, set boundaries, and rejuvenate - we allow our work in the world to unfold.

By work I mean love. Care. Creativity.

The more closely I pay attention to this in myself and others the more it is clear to me that this is one of the deepest issues we face.

We are up against ourselves and our self-concept in our moment-by-moment choices about how to be in the world. And I do mean moment-by-moment.

It’s quite convenient. We don’t take care of ourselves. So we’re not available enough to feel into what is actually happening around us. And thus we can’t do anything about it.

Who benefits from this?

What is this a repetition of?

So what is at stake in each moment-by-moment decision? Everything we care about most, everything we believe, and everything we long for.

The work of change and healing for ourselves and the world is the work of moment by moment decisions that allow our tender and strong hearts space to live and be and express themselves.

This is the hardest work. And has nothing to do with the spa.

Originally Published on

Alison Crosthwait